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Jazz piano vids on Youtube April 5, 2009

Posted by David Hiran Watson in Music.
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Check out these two great jazz piano videos on Youtube:

Chick Corea & Hiromi Uehara playing “Summertime” (by Gershwin) – http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=S2m4Oy9TWmo
Chick Corea & Hiromi Uehara playing “Spain” (by Chick Corea) – http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=BRU1o-sCnqY

Alright, if you’re scratching your head wondering who these two artists are and what the songs are, let me explain.

Chick Corea is a truly gifted musician who plays jazz. He is really great at improvisation, and to listen or watch him play is an experience you don’t want to miss. He effortlessly flies over the piano like it’s nothing! You know how many of us have areas, especially in the creative arts, where we wish what we thought of in our heads could be instantaneously transferred to whatever medium we’re using for expression? Well, Chick Corea is at that place when it comes to the piano.

Hiromi Uehara I had never actually heard of until I saw the above two videos, but as far as I can tell, she’s just like Chick Corea when it comes to jazz piano. Watching the two of them is like watching a passionate conversation take place using only the piano and non-verbal body language.

Alright, lastly the two songs are jazz pieces; the first is a famous one by George Gershwin as part of his Porgy and Bess opera. The second is an original composition by Chick Corea.

DH

Dear God April 5, 2009

Posted by David Hiran Watson in About Me, Daily Life-Walk, Faith, God.
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I’m going to take a page out of love, devi and style this post as a letter to God:

Dear God,

Tonight was pretty difficult; I’m sitting here at this moment listening to “Courage” by Superchic[k] and I have two questions to ask you. First, for those dealing with hurting and pain and difficulty, what difference does believing in you make? You and I both know that both questions arose in me earlier tonight while traveling home on the TTC. We also chatted about them at that time – well, more like I voiced them to you and then focused on the music coming out of my mp3 player. But I’m recounting them now both for the sake of anyone reading this, and because writing it this way is part of the healing (answering) process.

So back to the first question; if you recall I thought of the Footprints poem, and the line about how when there was one set of footprints, it was you carrying the dreamer. But I realized that both non-Christians and Christians get through hard times. (For those reading, I use those two terms in the traditional sense of the words). For example, a non-Christian, when confronted with losing a loved one, will experience the pain and loss. They will shed tears, go through the whole grieving process, and move on. Eventually the pain from the loss will completely cease, or at least subside to almost ‘background noise’. How is that any different from a Christian who turns to you during the grieving process for help? Alright, I admit that perhaps they will have a shorter grieving period, and there is also the prospect of hope that they will see the loved one in Heaven (should the loved one have been a Christian as well). But, in my eyes, there is no major ‘advantage’ to turning to you during the grieving process.

Or let’s look at another example: someone who is struggling with a difficult time, such as breaking an addiction. There is a lot of pain and hurt and hardship associated with an addiction – whether you’re the addicted one or someone you love is the addicted one – and breaking an addiction. My “church” upbringing tells me the ‘right’ answer to this scenario: my trusting you gives me your strength and invites you into the situation. But many who don’t trust you, who perhaps are not Christians, break addictions. Many who don’t trust you have their families healed and restored back from the damaging effects of an addiction.

Don’t get me wrong God, I’m not saying I don’t trust you or that I don’t want to trust you. Until recently, I struggled with the whole “If God is loving, why does He let us go through difficult times, etc” issue. I finally fully understand why your letting us go through hard times IS an act of love – I understand and believe. Of course it’s only because you broke through and made the intellectual understanding become heart understanding. My current struggle is, therefore, not why are people going through hard times. Rather, it’s whether trusting in you during our struggles makes any major difference? Honestly, I can’t see any major difference on the surface between someone who trusts in you and someone who doesn’t while they are going through a rough patch. Eventually both the person who trusts in you, and the one who doesn’t, gets through the rough patch and does so seemingly victorious and stronger for it. Yes, there are exceptions to the rule. But those exceptions exist, as far as I am aware, in both camps. Perhaps any major difference exists underneath the surface…

DH

Elitism (post from a friend) March 31, 2009

Posted by David Hiran Watson in Social Commentary.
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A friend of mine – Steve Mah – posted the following note on his Facebook notes page:

Elitism
“I have always wondered whether there is some merit in presenting one’s perspective with some degree of equivocation, reducing its accessibility. The accessibility thus reduced, the argument would be impervious to objections from individuals not possessing the thoughtfulness or the capacity to deconstruct it–in a sense, it might be assumed that those who cannot overcome this barrier would not have constructive input in the first place.

I’ve always wondered: is there a benefit to being unclear? If you make an argument clearly, absolutely anyone can disagree with you. If you aren’t clear, only the people who can figure out what you’re saying (or people who recognize the argument, despite it not being clear) can disagree with you. Maybe those people are the only ones who would have useful criticism anyway?”

Without digressing into commenting on the main point in the note – I’ll leave that up to you to internally or externally debate – I would like to comment on Steve’s writing:

I really enjoy Steve’s usage of the English vocabulary. It’s not often that I come across any sort online article that’s intelligent in terms of the specific words chosen to convey the idea(s) purported. I have come across well-written articles, but to me a well-written article is separate from the vocabulary used. A well-written article is well-written due to the structure of flow of ideas, and includes vocabulary and grammar used, but is so much more than that. As such, I have read well-written articles with bad grammar and spelling issues. I have even read popular well-written articles with bad grammar and spelling issues! But Steve uses the rich, varied English vocabulary to convey his meaning, and does so without sounding condenscending or improperly using “big” words.

One of the beautiful benefits to English borrowing from other languages is that each word has specific connotations; it’s often hard to properly translate an English phrase into another language because of this connotational aspect to our words. However, it’s hard to find someone today who recognizes that, and uses it to their advantage. I find that even I don’t have as great a grasp of the varied English vocabulary as I would like to. Many times when thinking of how to convey a meaning, whether written or spoken, I try to use specific wording to convey my full intention. In other words, if I can say something in 5 words, why say it in 10? But this requires me to know the “big” words in English, and especially know their connotations and their context.

On an ending thought: I wish the Western school system focused more on teaching the varied English vocabulary, especially in today’s social networking and social media world.

DH

Soundscapes and voices March 26, 2009

Posted by David Hiran Watson in Music, Social Commentary.
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I was thinking recently on the way tracks in the West (North America and Western Europe) are produced. Specifically I was thinking about how they are mixed. Through my cousin’s blog – Love, Devi – I was introduced to the artist Brooke Waggoner. I believe on her site you can download her album “Fresh Pair of Eyes”. (I would post the link, but I’m too lazy to Google it right now, so just search for Brooke Waggoner). Her style of music is classified as Alternative & Punk; I would classify it as a mix of jazz, classical, folk, and possibly alt. punk. You really need to listen to her music to understand why it’s hard to properly classify her style.

Anyway, back to the issue of mixing tracks: Brooke Waggoner is (I would say) a rare artist in that she seems to treat all voices the same. Before I explain what I mean by that, let me define my use of the word voice. For me, a voice in music is any unique, or individual, instrument or vocal (commonly referred to as human voice) in music. As an example, let’s take a song that is sung by a lead female singer, has a backup vocalist who sings harmony, and has a piano, two guitars, a bass guitar, and drums as instrumentation. This song has 7 voices, drums counting as one for simplicity. So, getting back to Brooke Waggoner, she treats all voices as the same. That is, her message in the song is expressed through all the voices; at times one voice will be more prominent in purporting that message, but all the voices and their parts are used and combined in expressing whatever she is epxressing through the song. If it helps to picture this, think of message as more than the meaning of the lyrics; it’s the overall mood the song is trying to create.

If you recall, I mentioned that Brooke Waggoner has a mix of folk in her songs. The folk aspect is very much heard in her lyrics – they are story-like in their flow. But even with her lyrics, while they are telling a story, they are not the most prominent part of the song. The story is really told by all the voices, and the combination of their parts. For example, in one song her lyrics mention about this guy listening to her as she plays a concerto on the piano. The piano is one of the voices in the song, and at this point, as the lead vocal voice sings the word concerto, the pianist plays a tiptoe-type walkdown through half a scale. Basically, the piano part is made to sound like you’re listening to a classical concerto. Bringing all of this back to mixing, at this point, when the pianist plays the walkdown, the piano voice is made a little more prominent in the mix compared to the point just before when the lead vocalist was singing and the piano was backing.

Thus, the idea of treating all voices the same does not mean they all have to be at the same volume level through the whole song. Rather, the message of the song can be realized and expressed through all the voices. What I commonly hear in Western music is the message of the song realized and expressed through the vocals, and supported by the instruments. It’s almost like the instruments are there to provide structural support and nothing more. The focus is only on the vocals. To use an a painting analogy, the instruments are treated as the frame on which the painting is hung, and the vocals as the actual painting. Treating all voices the same would be viewing all the voices as the actual painting – perhaps just different colours in the painting.

As I implied, mixing while treating all the voices the same will still give prominence at certain points to certain voices. This also includes the idea of having certain voices – namely instruments such as bass guitar and drums – as structurally supportive voices. And I recognize that certain songs will need the prominence or focus given exclusively to the vocal voices, and the instrument voices will all have to be treated as structurally supportive voices. An example of a song like that, to me, is “Bleeding Love” by Leona Lewis. But, the point is that the basis upon which voice(s) carry or express the message should depend upon the message itself. It shouldn’t depend upon some cultural bias toward differentiating importance of various voices.

If, after reading all of this, you’re confused and don’t get the point I’m describing, check out Brooke Waggoner’s songs. I finally googled her, and her media page is here. If you scroll down that page to the track listing of her album “Fresh Pair of Eyes”, you have the opportunity to listen to each track (I believe fully). The example I gave above was from the track “So So”, but “My Legionnaire” also demonstrates my point quite well.

DH

Presence and Power of God February 26, 2009

Posted by David Hiran Watson in Church, God.
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Pastor Brendan Witton, senior pastor of Church Without Limits just posted the following at his blog. The post is titled All we can do is give them a hug…”.

I finally finished Pursuit of the Holy by Cory Russell… a really good read.

Here is another quote that just hit me:

“We are spiritually barren. We don’t have the knowledge of God and we don’t have the fear of the LORD and only a few are even in pursuit of these things. Our churches and cities and families are not turning back to God. It doesn’t matter how many Bible Schools we have, how many church plants we have, or how many radio and television ministries we have. Our cities are not turning back to God. In fact they appear to be going the opposite direction. When those who are dying, sick, troubled, hurting, addicted, abused and abandoned show up at the doors of the Church, we are not able to help them. We can’t heal, deliver, cure or comfort them. It takes the power of God to do that. And we don’t have the power of God, the presence of God or the knowledge of God. All we can do is give them a hug, sign them up for a home group and hope for the best. Things will not get better because we use the latest evangelism method or create a better radio commercial, because at the end of the day, only the presence and power of God can affect eternity.” (pg. 128)

DH

My Struggles, Pt. 1 February 25, 2009

Posted by David Hiran Watson in About Me.
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I’m going to get quite personal in this post; I have been debating in my mind how personal I should get with this blog, but at times like this blogging helps me to focus my thoughts and perhaps by my sharing others can be encouraged. Also, I don’t recall how much I’ve shared in previous posts and I can’t be bothered to check right now, so if any of what I share is ‘old news’, bear with me.

I’ve been going to counseling for about 1.25 years now, and the purpose is to work through the various issues I struggle with deep down. In many ways we all have issues we are working through. But some people, like myself, have issues that are quite deep and complex; they are usually the type that cause people to see counselors and/or go on medication. They are also usually caused by a person’s childhood – that is, one or more events, or the general way the person was raised, directly created this (these) issue(s). I like the way my current counselor put it – this (type of) person has cracks in the foundation that develops in our childhood.

For me, there is pretty much only one major issue, and it stems from how I was raised. My issue is lack of parental approval. A lot of people struggle with this to varying degrees, but it generally becomes a deep issue in someone’s life when the parents failed to instill an underlying positive message of self-worth. A healthy message would go along the lines of, “You’re approved and have worth in being, not in doing.” In other words, someone’s self-worth shouldn’t be reliant on what they achieve, but just in the act of being a human being. Getting back to a person’s parents and the message they convey, there are two points to keep in mind. One, the overall, long-term, message conveyed can be different from the message conveyed in specific instances. Two, messages (especially from authority figures) can be conveyed through non-verbal means. In fact, most of everyday communication is non-verbal. And further, if our verbal and non-verbal communication oppose each other, the receiver tends to latch upon the non-verbal communication.

With those two points in mind, it’s easy to see how in my case (and many others), my parents ended up conveying an underlying negative message of self-worth and approval. I say my parents ended up because chances are that it was unintentional on their part. Also, there were times where they expressed a positive message, both verbally and non-verbally. Unfortunately, the negative messages stuck more to my child psyche – perhaps because they were more frequent, or they were the non-verbal messages whereas the verbal ones were the positive messages.

At any rate, this issue has made itself a presence in my life since about 2001, when I went away to university. For the first 5-6 years, and especially for the 4 years I was in university, I didn’t have much conscious awareness of what the issue was. I more felt it was there subconsciously and was very reactive as a result. (Picture having a physical wound but at first not knowing where; all you feel at first is the pain of it, and your response is what I would term reactionary.) From about 2002 onward, I did see about 4 other counselors before I went to the one I’m seeing now. However, I only saw them for short periods – from about a few weeks to about 4 months. I was also misdiagnosed as OCD, and in about 2006, through the help of one of the 4 counselors, realized that I was clinically depressed. In hindsight, I’ve been clinically depressed since about 2001/2002, although perhaps not continually. It has only been in the past 1.25 years, with the current counselor, that I’ve had a lot of conscious awareness about this issue – what it is, why I’m struggling with it, etc.

I had started this post with the intent to write about what came out of my last counseling session, which has been on my mind a lot. From that point of view, all of the above is preamble and background text, which is necessary. However, it’s late and I have to wake up in about 4.5 hours, so I’m going to end this post. I’ll try and write about what I actually wanted to write on soon.

DH

Psalm 40 February 20, 2009

Posted by David Hiran Watson in Scripture.
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1 I waited patiently for the LORD;
he turned to me and heard my cry.

2 He lifted me out of the slimy pit,
out of the mud and mire;
he set my feet on a rock
and gave me a firm place to stand.

3 He put a new song in my mouth,
a hymn of praise to our God.
Many will see and fear
and put their trust in the LORD.

4 Blessed is the man
who makes the LORD his trust,
who does not look to the proud,
to those who turn aside to false gods.

5 Many, O LORD my God,
are the wonders you have done.
The things you planned for us
no one can recount to you;
were I to speak and tell of them,
they would be too many to declare.

6 Sacrifice and offering you did not desire,
but my ears you have pierced;
burnt offerings and sin offerings
you did not require.

7 Then I said, “Here I am, I have come—
it is written about me in the scroll.

8 I desire to do your will, O my God;
your law is within my heart.”

9 I proclaim righteousness in the great assembly;
I do not seal my lips,
as you know, O LORD.

10 I do not hide your righteousness in my heart;
I speak of your faithfulness and salvation.
I do not conceal your love and your truth
from the great assembly.

11 Do not withhold your mercy from me, O LORD;
may your love and your truth always protect me.

12 For troubles without number surround me;
my sins have overtaken me, and I cannot see.
They are more than the hairs of my head,
and my heart fails within me.

13 Be pleased, O LORD, to save me;
O LORD, come quickly to help me.

14 May all who seek to take my life
be put to shame and confusion;
may all who desire my ruin
be turned back in disgrace.

15 May those who say to me, “Aha! Aha!”
be appalled at their own shame.

16 But may all who seek you
rejoice and be glad in you;
may those who love your salvation always say,
“The LORD be exalted!”

17 Yet I am poor and needy;
may the Lord think of me.
You are my help and my deliverer;
O my God, do not delay.

Bible Gateway link: http://www.biblegateway.com/passage/?search=psalm%2040&version=31

DH

God IS February 20, 2009

Posted by David Hiran Watson in Daily Life-Walk, Faith, God.
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So, anyone who has interacted with me over the past 2-3 months will vouch for the fact that I have been struggling in my faith, and my relationship with God. I am not going to go into all the details, but suffice to say that my journey over the past few years of working through some deep issues that arose through my childhood has seemed to take on a cyclic path over the past 1-2 years specifically. Cyclical meaning a cycle of highs and lows, where, during the high cycles,  I go through a time period of being close to God and, as a result, having greater success in dealing with the deep issues.  In the low cycles, I still walk with God, but have decided some aspect of the struggle is too much to bear, and set a threshold on how close I allow myself to draw to God. In other words, I stagnate to a degree in my faith. This usually happens because I start focusing on the struggle itself a little bit too much. Throughout this process, God is still guiding me and (patiently and faithfully) helping me work through the issues. The counselor I’m seeing is one of the ways God does this.

Anyway, getting back to the point of this post, these past few months I have been in a low cycle. Again, without going into full details, I was, through a combination of struggling with sin, getting angry and blaming God, and picking at the scabs of my own pain, stagnating in my faith. Essentially, I loved God and had a relationship with Him, but I did not surrender to Him, allowing myself to believe that it was not safe to do so.

Tonight God broke through all of the farce and walls, and suddenly gave me a experiential revelation that it is safe to surrender to Him, because HE IS SAFE! I love it when God does that – breaks through all the mud and mire to shine His light and truth. He had actually been laying the building blocks to this moment of revelation for the past week or so, ever since the SI incident last Thursday (Feb. 12).

I do want to thank God for this moment, and His putting up with my selfishness. I also want to thank Him for the Christian brothers and sisters I have talked to within the past week; I am eternally grateful to them.

DH

Twitter Account February 20, 2009

Posted by David Hiran Watson in About Me.
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Now, to anyone following this blog, I apologize that I have not been posting in a while (since the end of last year, 2008). However, I do have some big news: I just signed up for a Twitter account; you can find it at @dEhiN.

As for the sparsity of posts, I must confess that I completely forgot about this blog. Well, at first I gave into procrastination, but as time went on, I forgot about this blog. Part of the issue is that I very quickly move from one interest to another, and so do not tend to ‘persevere’ with an interest for long. I do, however, tend to cycle through a small group of interests. Thus, in the long run, any interests I have get developed.

DH

Moving Tales December 14, 2008

Posted by David Hiran Watson in About Me, Everyday Life.
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So I finally moved my computer monitor from the garage to my room! Yay! Um…I suppose I should write a bit of back story, especially why this is a yay moment.

For those reading this who don’t know, I moved (again) on Nov. 29. I had finally (and permanently) moved out of my parents’ place mid-August to a 3-bedroom place. For the first month and a half I was the only one living there, and then my former landlord’s step-uncle moved in as a superintendent. A young couple then moved in to the third room in October. At any rate, things were pretty good at first, but then soured with the super, and he turned out to be fairly difficult to live with. After thought and prayer, I decided to move out and make November my last month.

The place I’m in now is a townhouse and I’m actually rooming with a friend of mine and his mom. It’s a nice place, and definitely a much better atmosphere than the old place. (Side note: I never realized before how much the presence/absence of Christ changes the atmosphere of a place.)

Back to my moving tale: while at the 3-bedroom place, I unpacked some stuff – mostly my bed, and my computer and speakers. I was even using a garbage bag for my everyday clothing, instead of hanging them up! In retrospect that made it easier to move, although it did not do much for contributing to a sense of belonging or finality of moving in. In this new place, it has been a couple of weeks, and I have not even unpacked half of my items! I have set up my bedding, and (a step further than before) hung up my everyday outerwear, although I am still using a garbage bag for the rest of my clothing. Coming back to the monitor, when I moved, I had stored some things a week earlier in my friend’s mom’s garage beside the townhouse. On the 29th, I moved everything into my room, except my computer monitor. This is why the monitor being moved into my room, and actually set up on my desk, is a big yay moment.

Now if I can only keep this momentum going, and actually speed it up…

DH